ADHD, RSD, and Writing: How Rejection Sensitivity Impacts Our Creative Work

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It’s been just over two years since I opened my e-mail to find the offer letter for my first book “It All Makes Sense Now”. After receiving that life changing message, the rest of the day was a blur of trying to strong arm my focus and contain my excitement as I attended to my regularly scheduled work and family obligations. I don’t remember much from that day, but I do remember having the house to myself for a few moments that evening and holding a solo dance party in the kitchen. The joy I felt in that moment was the kind that I’ve lived long enough to know is rare and worth treasuring.

As I struggled to calm my brain enough to sleep that night, I remember feeling the excitement slowly fade away. It was replaced by something I experienced far more often. Anticipatory anxiety about the RSD I knew loomed in the months ahead of me. I wasn’t just going to write a book… people were going to read it. And some of those people weren’t going to like it.

What is RSD and why are ADHDers extra susceptible to it?

Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) is a term coined by top ADHD expert Dr. William Dodson that refers to a reaction to a perceived (real or imagined) rejection that is very large in proportion to the incident.

ADHDers are thought to experience RSD reactions thanks to a combination of our emotional regulation struggles and the fact that many of us experience a much larger volume of negative messages about our behavior from an early age.

Unidentified and unchecked, RSD can be hugely painful and sabotage the success of an ADHD writer. It can be extremely difficult to eliminate RSD reactions entirely, but if we better understand it, we can more effectively navigate all the rejection that is inevitable when you share your work publicly.

Ways RSD can impact writers

One of the most obvious impacts of RSD is the consequences of our actions that result from our reactions. RSD may lead to defensive or aggressive interactions with the people we need in our corner to help our career such as readers, editors, agents and publicists. These hard to control reactions can erode trust, credibility and tarnish our reputation.

It’s not just the reaction and our behavior in the moment that can impact our trajectory as ADHD writers. Sometimes it’s the memory of the pain we feel when experiencing RSD that sabotages our success. We may avoid getting feedback on our work or sharing it publicly to avoid the pain of RSD.

Some of us even find ourselves overthinking every word on the page, attempting to craft a piece that no one could possibly critique. Deep down we know this is an impossible feat so we may lose momentum, leaving an endless file of drafts left unfinished.

RSD even can find us after we have overcome the many challenges and obstacles to publishing. So many of us are exhausted from battling RSD throughout the process that we can’t find the bandwidth to promote and market our work. Burnout is common for ADHD writers and RSD is one of many contributing factors.

Strategies ADHD writers can employ to soften the impact of RSD

Reflect on how you prefer to receive feedback and communicate that preference

Do you know that you have difficulty controlling your reaction when receiving feedback verbally? Communicate this to your editor and others collaborating with you on your writing projects. Let them know you prefer to receive written feedback.

Do negative reviews take up residence in your brain for years and refuse to be evicted? Consider enlisting an assistant to filter out reviews that do not offer constructive feedback. If you don’t have the means to hire this type of support, it’s a valid choice to choose not to read reviews. Many authors go this route and report better mental health because of it.

Know your triggers and cope ahead when you can

If you know that negative comments on a post can ruin your entire day, build some nervous system regulation habits into your writing routine. Perhaps celebrate every time you publish a post with a calming walk or meditation session. These activities widen the zone of what we can tolerate and prepare us to handle stressors. Become familiar with the practices that help you downregulate when you feel dysregulated (like box breathing or grounding exercises) and practice them even when you aren’t experiencing RSD. When we cope ahead by practicing these techniques it can increase the chances that we can utilize these tools when we do face the intensity of rejection.

Consider professional support is it is accessible to you

One of the best investments I have made in my career wasn’t a writing course or retreat, it was hiring an ADHD informed therapist. Having a space where I can share fears and process experiences was incredibly beneficial throughout the process of publishing my first book.

Writing is an incredibly vulnerable act for anyone, and if you have a neurodivergent brain the pain of exposure can be amplified. Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a very real experience rooted in how your brain is wired. As ADHD writers, our intense emotions may make us more vulnerable, but it also makes us deeply empathetic, insightful, and attuned to nuance, qualities that make us powerful storytellers. When RSD is better understood and supported, it stops feeling like an impossible challenge and becomes something we can acknowledge and navigate as we build sustainable and fulfilling lives as writers.

How has RSD impacted your approach to writing? Have you found ways to navigate this difficult trait of ADHD? Share with the community in the comments.