The Aftermath of Publishing a Book with ADHD

Reflecting on the publishing process on my books first birthday

I originally wrote this for my Substack “It All Makes Sense Now- ADHD Insights”, but wanted to share it here as well since it ties into themes Jesse and I explore in this newsletter.

Last week, I recorded a podcast episode with John Jay Van Es, host of the nationally syndicated John Jay and Rich radio show. During our conversation he asked me “How did you even manage to write a book with ADHD?

My answer to this question is actually quite simple. Writing was the (relatively) easy part. It’s everything else that came with the process of publishing a book that was difficult.

This week marked the 1st anniversary of my books release and just like I do annually as I prepare to celebrate another trip around the sun, I found myself reflecting on the last year quite often and found the best way to process my experiences is through writing.

These are the lessons that stand out.

Vulnerability hangovers are real, and you prolong them if you try to push through

Over the past several years as I have grown an audience on social media, I’ve learned over and over again that visibility takes a toll. I’m grateful that I was able to learn this lesson in smaller doses prior to my book release. Still, after the excitement of being offered a book deal wore off, I was smacked with the realization that once this book was written, people might actually read it, and worse, have negative opinions about it.

Prior to my books release I invested quite a lot of time in strengthening my ability to tolerate the discomfort of visibility. I set the typical goals that authors set around reviews and marketing, but I also set another more important goal, getting through the year without experiencing a major period of burnout. That meant balancing opportunities with capacity and being willing to say no. It meant looking at my calendar not from a simple lens of hours available but examining it from a bandwidth perspective. I learned that I could tolerate the discomfort of being seen but that I needed to give myself space to breathe and reflect during periods of higher visibility.

Dedicating resources into emotional regulation and stress management was essential

Many authors talk about the budget they dedicate into marketing and publicity but it’s not often that we discuss the resources we are allocating to managing the growth edge we must face when publishing our work for the first time.

Knowing my ADHD brain struggles with emotional regulation and RSD I knew I would need to invest in extra support with this throughout the process. I worked with a therapist that gave me a space to process my fears of judgement and failing and reminded me that I needed to pace myself throughout the process of promoting my book.

I craved quieter times but when they arrived it was uncomfortable

Every step of the publishing process of this book seemed to coincide with another major life stressor.

My husband was rushed to the ICU for emergency brain surgery one day after finalizing my contract.

I received developmental edits while I was recovering from a frightening health event that resulted in a concussion. Meeting those deadlines while battling headaches and desperately trying to give my brain rest from screens was harrowing.

I moved my oldest child into her dorm for her first year of college 1,500 miles away from home 2 days before my pub date.

After navigating the most exciting accomplishment of my professional life while concurrently managing one of the hardest seasons in my personal life, I have been fantasizing about rest and normalcy. But now that quieter times are here, I’m finding myself unsettled.

Logically I know that while my ADHD brain thrives in times that provide urgency, I still need to take this time to recover and recalibrate to a sustainable pace. Knowing this is the easy part, it’s accepting it, that is much harder when apathy and boredom loom.

Achieving a lifelong dream felt amazing, but the real gift is in the process.

I’m not the same person I was before I took on this project. Writing a book has showed me both the depths of my resilience and the areas where there is still tremendous opportunity for growth.

Promoting the book has forced me to push my comfort zone around self-promotion and test negative beliefs I hold around sales and marketing.

Most importantly this past year has facilitated countless fulfilling conversations with readers and professionals in the ADHD community. These interactions with people that deeply inspire me, have filled me with hope in a time when it can be hard to come by.

As I settle into this quieter chapter, I'm learning to trust that rest isn't regression and that the discomfort of stillness is just another opportunity for growth. The conversations, connections, and self-discoveries that emerged from this process have become the true measure of what I've accomplished. Sometimes the most meaningful victories aren't the ones we celebrate publicly, but the internal shifts that happen when we push ourselves beyond what we thought possible.

What's the hardest part of the creative process for you - the actual writing, the editing, or the promoting/sharing phase? Share with the community in the comments below.